Chapter 29

Chapter 29 – Please Let Me Cry (1)

Erin frowned at him, clearly telling him to move away, but Gabriel ignored it without a second thought.

“Move,” she said.

When he still did not budge, Erin shoved his shoulder and tried to pass him, intent on leaving. The only reason she was not actively restraining him was because circumstances made it impossible. She had no desire to share the same space, the same air, with him for even a moment longer.

She was just about to step outside when Gabriel suddenly hooked an arm around her waist and pulled her onto his lap.

“…Let go.” She growled the words as she glared at him, but Gabriel only buried his face against the nape of her neck.

“You were the one who asked about the book,” he said, sounding almost petulant.

Erin stared at him, dumbfounded by the sulking tone.

It had not been long, but from what she had seen so far, Gabriel was far more stubborn than she had expected. If he did not hear what he wanted, he would not let her go. Unwilling to waste her energy on something so pointless, she decided to give him what he wanted.

“You spoke as if you were certain I would be able to read it.”

“…Maybe I wanted to play a small prank on you.” Gabriel pressed a kiss into her hair. “And if that were true, would you have trusted me?”

“With you, that sounds entirely possible,” Erin replied flatly. “Now move.”

Still, Gabriel showed no intention of pulling away. Erin’s scowl deepened.

That day, when she had been unable to breathe from thirst, something in him had begun to change. The man who had once tried every possible way to ruin her had suddenly started acting like this, and she could not understand why.

She was not denying the kiss itself. That was not the issue. What irritated her was the audacity of him daring to touch her like that, not that it had shaken her emotions in any way.

Then, unbidden, the memory of their reunion surfaced. The reunion that had been the beginning of all this misfortune. That day, too, he had looked down at her with the same mocking gaze and told her that he felt exactly what she felt toward him.

Suddenly, she found herself curious. She had clear reasons for hating him, but what reason did he have to act this way toward her?

“…You said you wanted to tear me apart and kill me, just like I do you.”

“To remember that,” Gabriel replied lightly, “should I take it as an honor?”

“You could kill me at any time, yet you do not. That is what disgusts me.”

In the end, Erin shoved him away and stood up, straightening her rumpled uniform. Gabriel remained seated in her chair, head bowed, as though lost in thought.

She looked at him for a moment, then asked the question that had been lingering.

“What did I ever do to you for you to treat me like this?”

At her words, Gabriel slowly lifted his head. He looked as though he might burst into tears at any second. When he spoke, his voice was strained and wet, as if soaked in sorrow.

“…Even if I told you, you would not understand.”

For some reason, tears did not fall, yet he was crying all the same as he looked at her.

Even witnessing that, Erin felt nothing. No anger, no curiosity, no pity, no sympathy. Nothing at all.

The only thing she felt toward him was the desire to find the heart of the Night Demon and kill him as soon as possible.

Before that, she had to restore her ruined honor. She had to reclaim the name Erin Ferr, not the woman reduced to a sacrifice for a demon god, but Erin Ferr, the First Captain whom no one had dared to touch.

She did not have the time or energy to react to him, to get angry at every little thing he did. Even that felt like a waste.

She met his gaze. Truly, his eyes were impossible to read.

“It seems you have no intention of telling me.”

She had not expected an answer to begin with. Even so, Gabriel twisted his expression again, clearly displeased by her words.

So expressive. She had never realized he was a man with so many faces.

“Why,” he asked sharply, “do you want to know?”

Why was he angry at her? What did he want her to understand? What did he resent her for?

Unlike before, there was an edge to him now. Erin replied with an indifferent expression.

“You destroyed everything I built, yet I do not even know why you treat me this way. That is why I asked.”

But since he did not want to tell her, she no longer wanted to know.

Perhaps this was what it meant to hate someone beyond the point of murderous intent. To feel no desire to pour out any emotion at all.

Once again, she realized how deeply one could come to hate another.

“And if I never tell you?” Gabriel asked, his tone tinged with mockery.

Erin answered calmly.

“Then I do not think I want to know anymore.”

With that, she left him behind and walked out.

***

The best place to organize one’s thoughts was somewhere devoid of people.

The temple was too crowded, with the constant risk of running into someone. Instead, Erin chose the roof of the grand sanctuary.

When she released the magic and looked beyond the barrier, the sight before her was nothing but ash. It was as if no one remained but her, just like eighteen years ago.

Yet because there was nothing left, the chaos in her mind slowly settled. She stood there, quietly taking in the view.

“Hello.”

She had sensed nothing. Erin twisted her body and instantly summoned a longsword from thin air.

The woman before her had bronze skin and curly red hair. She smiled gently as she looked at Erin, her eyes the same color as Erin’s own.

The sensation was the same one she had felt when facing Gabriel, only stronger. Far stronger.

Unlike him, this woman could kill her the moment she made a single wrong move.

“Do not be afraid,” the woman said warmly. “I only came to say hello today.”

Still smiling, she pressed a fingertip lightly against the tip of Erin’s sword.

After watching her with suspicion for a moment, Erin finally dismissed the blade. The woman’s smile widened in clear approval.

“What a good girl.”

No matter how she looked at it, this woman was a demon god like Gabriel. According to the records, there were only three. The Silver Demon, the Fire Demon, and the Night Demon.

“…The Fire Demon?” Erin asked cautiously.

“I prefer the name Sistus,” the woman replied. “Would you call me that instead?”

Erin frowned in silence.

Sistus let out a bored chuckle.

“How dull.”

“Why are you here?” Erin demanded.

“I told you. To say hello.”

Sistus toyed with her lips, then smiled in a way that carried far too much meaning.

“And because I want to make you a very appealing offer.”

Erin said nothing, simply waiting for her to continue. For a moment, the two of them locked gazes in silence.

“I will kill the Silver Demon for you.”

“…What?”

As Erin frowned, Sistus bared her teeth in a grin.

“Shall I say it again? I said I would kill Carlisle for you.”

Then, as if just remembering something, Sistus let out a short exclamation.

“Oh, right. He hates that name. I am sure he introduced himself as Gabriel.”

At that moment, something else flashed through Erin’s mind.

That name is so pretty. I like it better. I should change it.

Ever since meeting him again, strange fragments like this kept surfacing.

Annoyed by the memories trying to tangle themselves together, Erin scowled.

“Is it not a good deal?” Sistus pressed. “You want him dead.”

“I do,” Erin replied.

But she did not need anyone’s help to cut Gabriel’s throat.

If she had wanted help, she would have taken it long ago. That revenge was hers alone. She had no intention of letting anyone steal it from her.

“With my own hands.”

“…It is impressive how the two of you resemble each other in the most pointless ways,” Sistus muttered.

At that, Erin swung her sword at her with blinding speed.

Despite the force and velocity of the strike, everything seemed to slow. Sistus’s hardened expression, the blade aiming precisely for her neck, all of it unfolded as if in slow motion.

In that instant, Sistus caught the blade with her bare hand and yanked it toward herself.

Pulled along by the motion, Erin closed the distance and drove mana into her foot, striking Sistus squarely in the abdomen.

Something astonishing happened. Gabriel had once caught her kick and thrown her aside as if it were nothing.

Yet Sistus was sent flying far into the distance.

So magic only does not work on Gabriel, then.

She had learned something new.

Sistus spat out the blood pooling in her mouth onto the ground.

“…You could have just said no.” She shrugged as if it could not be helped.

“What a shame.”

With those words, she vanished.