Chapter 23

Chapter 23 – Into the Abyss (3)

…He could not do it.

Gabriel let his trembling hands fall away from her throat and simply stared down at her with unfocused eyes. The emptiness of facing a desire that could never be fulfilled hollowed him out.

Could I really do it?

Slowly, he lowered his head and pressed his face into the curve of her neck. The heat of her skin brushed his lips, so warm it felt as though he might melt into it and disappear. For a moment, that seemed acceptable. To dissolve like this, quietly, without resistance.

Her pulse throbbed faintly beneath his mouth.

He knew that even standing beside her could wound her. He knew exactly who he was to her. And still, still…

Gabriel reached out and took her hand, first loosely, then entwining their fingers as if that alone were not enough. Greed crept in despite him. He pressed a gentle kiss to the back of her hand, and his chest tightened as if tears might spill.

With a shuddering breath that sounded almost like a sob, he clung to her and held her close.

If Erin were to wake and see him like this, she would despise him. She would curse him with those red lips, sharp and unrelenting.

So let me do this where you cannot see, he pleaded silently. Just this much. Please allow me that.

Gabriel exhaled slowly, exhaustion weighing on him. The memory of her lips still lingered vividly against his own. At first, it had been desperation. A frantic attempt to stop her spiraling breath.

Or rather, he had used that as an excuse.

By the time he came to his senses, his hands had already traced her skin. If he had realized even a moment later, Erin would not now be sleeping in his arms.

If he had moved with abandon, if he had tightened his hold and driven himself against her slender waist, she would have stirred. He could have devoured every inch of that sweet flesh, consumed her completely.

I should not have stopped, he thought bitterly.

Regret clung to him like mud. He buried his face deeper into her neck, breathing in her scent, lingering longer than he should. He wanted to stay like this, just a little more, but forced himself to pull away.

After a moment, Gabriel straightened and rose carefully to his feet.

He wanted desperately to let her sleep here, but he knew she would never accept that. Cradling her gently, he carried her back to her bedroom.

He could have left that underground prison whenever he wished. He always could. He had merely chosen to remain, obedient and quiet, like a well behaved hound.

He laid Erin down with care and stood watching her. In such a short time, she had grown thinner. The strain she carried showed even in sleep.

With the tips of his fingers, Gabriel brushed along her sharpened jaw, and hatred slowly began to swell within him toward the humans who had done this to her.

Should I kill them all in secret?

He was the one who had bound her. But it was they who had pushed her toward the cliff.

Humans had always been the same. When things became inconvenient, they chose a single sacrifice and tore them apart with even greater cruelty.

As he smoothed her hair, a thought surfaced.

I hate humans.

Perhaps he had always felt this way. Only now did he truly understand it.

He twined a strand of her dark hair around his fingers and considered his next steps. He would go south with her and help. In the meantime, he could return to the capital whenever he wished and quietly eliminate those who tormented her.

Neatly. Cleanly. Without leaving any trace of a demon god. Death by political struggle would suffice.

It is not a bad plan, he mused.

Lost in visions of offering severed heads for her sake, Gabriel noticed that midnight had already passed.

If Erin awoke, they would need to depart immediately. This was the only chance to drink her blood.

This atmosphere is hardly ideal, he thought, grimacing.

But the contract allowed no choice. If he did not drink, she would die.

He carefully bit into her index finger and began to drink.

The blood filled his mouth, sweet and fragrant, melting through him. The pain was sharp, but the sweetness that followed was irresistible. As he took a few measured mouthfuls, a presence stirred beyond the door, and his gaze hardened.

That one again.

Gabriel kept Erin’s finger between his lips and fixed his eyes on the door. A knock followed, hesitant, and a familiar voice spoke.

“Commander, may I come in?” Ten asked quietly.

Silence followed, as though he were waiting for her answer.

“Commander?” he called again.

When no response came, Ten spoke more cautiously. “I will enter briefly, then.”

The door opened softly, and Ten stepped inside carrying two mugs.

It was the same man Gabriel had once attacked while disguised.

Ten paused, eyes flicking toward the bed. Gabriel met his gaze, then released Erin’s finger deliberately. Watching Ten’s face twist was amusing. Slowly, almost tauntingly, Gabriel licked the wound closed.

Ten’s jaw clenched, his posture shifting as though he were ready to draw his sword.

“Shh,” Gabriel whispered, raising a finger.

Ten did not relax.

Did he learn that glare from her? Gabriel thought with faint amusement.

How ridiculous. One flick of a finger would kill him, yet he thought himself threatening.

Gabriel rose silently and stepped closer.

“She just fell asleep,” he said calmly. “Be quiet.”

“How are you even here?” Ten demanded, voice tight.

Gabriel tilted his head, genuinely puzzled. “Did you truly believe a place built by humans could hold me?”

Naive.

He smiled, then noticed the mug in Ten’s hands. His expression cooled instantly.

I should have killed him earlier.

The hot chocolate inside the cup steamed gently. Gabriel looked down at Ten, suppressing the surge of murderous impulse.

“She needs rest,” Gabriel said evenly. “Take that and leave.”

“And how am I supposed to trust you?” Ten snapped.

Protective, even now. Gabriel found it oddly endearing.

“Why?” Gabriel asked lightly. “Afraid I might kiss her?”

He touched his lips, then flushed theatrically. “I already did. It was exquisite.”

“Do not disgrace the Commander,” Ten growled.

The divine power flaring from Ten was impressive, if poorly hidden. Gabriel raised an eyebrow.

So that is why he felt off earlier.

By holy standards, he was near a high priest. Why had he chosen knighthood?

Then it clicked.

He followed her.

Gabriel laughed softly into his hand. Absurdly earnest. Foolishly brave.

“That pitiful holy power will do you no good,” Gabriel said gently. “You should lower it.”

“I will leave once you do,” Ten replied firmly.

That restraint snapped.

Gabriel seized Ten’s shoulder, crushing down until a suppressed groan escaped him. He leaned in, forcing their eyes to meet.

Why did flies always gather around her?

With deadened eyes and a voice thick with obsession, Gabriel whispered, “What were you hoping to do with Erin? You like her, do you not? You look at her as a woman.”

Ten said nothing.

“You want to kiss her,” Gabriel continued softly. “You want to stand beside her as her lover.”

His grip tightened.

“How dare you,” Gabriel murmured, venom seeping through his words. “A holy knight who harbors such desire.”

“This is not something I will hear from you,” Ten spat.

His shoulder trembled, but he did not break. That courage only deepened Gabriel’s irritation.

I should kill him now.

No. Better to wait. They would be heading south soon. An unfortunate death by undead would raise no suspicion.

Then Erin would suffer.

…No.

“Damn it,” Gabriel muttered, clicking his tongue in irritation.

The urge would have to wait.