Chapter 41

Matthias’s absence was far more profound than she had ever anticipated. The void he left behind—he, who had been the constant in her daily life—was like a gaping chasm, as if more than half of her existence had been severed. It was a strange, almost unsettling emptiness that filled every moment, as if there were no time in which he didn’t linger in her thoughts.

Had she truly been so dependent on Matthias all this time? The realization struck Odelliana with a sharp pang of surprise.

Every corner of her life bore the marks of his presence. The clothes he had chosen for her, the candles he lit when the time came, the soothing ointment he’d rubbed into her hair after her baths, the fresh bedding he would arrange for her before bed or upon her waking, the meals he had prepared with his own hands, and even the medicine he had carefully organized for her use. Matthias had, in fact, woven himself into every aspect of her existence.

“Has a day ever felt this long?” she murmured.

Time seemed to stretch, slower than it had when she had first awoken in a strange body, locked in a filthy room, staring blankly at the walls. This sense of monotony was suffocating. The absence of the one who had once been beside her now felt like a weight too heavy to bear. The hollow she felt seemed closer to the despair of an old man who, after years of life, had withdrawn to a solitary mountain to wait for death. Even he, perhaps, would not know such profound loneliness.

And with the rainy season settling in, the incessant downpour mirrored the heaviness of her heart. The cold, gray weather stretched on, casting everything into shadow, and turning her solitude into a quiet, consuming despair.

Odelliana felt a rising sense of crisis, as though she were on the brink of losing her mind. She desperately needed to do something to break free from the suffocating dread that gripped her, but the heaviness weighing down on her body was stronger than any willpower she could summon. The oppressive weather made each breath feel labored, and even the thought of exercising—something that normally brought her some relief—felt utterly beyond her.

“With the weather like this… people are already dying in the streets,” Malena said, her voice tinged with concern. “I’m worried, too. Your condition has clearly worsened. I’ll bring you some medicine tonight to help restore your strength.”

“…Is there still no word from my brother?” Odelliana asked, her voice faint.

“He’s still away on business.”

“Maybe he’s avoiding me on purpose.”

“I don’t think so. It really seems like he has something important to attend to. He’s probably busy with preparations for independence.”

That would be a relief, but Odelliana couldn’t shake the thought that he might be deliberately staying away. Blair had never been known for decisiveness—particularly when it came to matters involving family. She couldn’t help but wonder.

“How’s the situation with my older brother?” she asked.

“Don’t even ask.” Malena’s voice was sharp. “He’s like a tyrant these days. It seems like the stress of searching for the culprit has driven him mad. Yesterday, he was screaming and throwing things around. One of the servants even ended up with a cut on his forehead.”

“Such a temper,” Odelliana murmured, her mind spinning.

“By the way, who do you think it could be?” Malena continued, her voice low. “It’s strange that there are no reliable witnesses for what happened in broad daylight. Everyone’s story is the same. They saw a man rush the carriage, but that’s all. They only vaguely remember a male figure but can’t recall any distinguishing features.”

Odelliana’s thoughts drifted to Matthias. He had always been exceptional at hiding his presence, disappearing into the background when he needed to. 

In battle, he had led battalions from the front, but his specialty was not charge attacks; it was ambushes. With movements so swift they were almost impossible to track, he would close the distance and slit throats—his signature skill. If he had been an assassin, he would have earned widespread fame, even capable of assassinating the king.

“That means he must be someone who can move with incredible agility. He’s probably not an ordinary man,” Malena mused.

My poor older brother is getting more and more frustrated because he can’t catch the culprit, Odelliana thought, amused.

“It’s humiliating,” Malena added. “For someone as proud as he is, being attacked in broad daylight and left a crippled man is a huge disgrace. Not to mention, your older brother was a renowned general.”

Hermann, the eldest son of the Grüsewald family, had inherited the title of heir at a young age. Despite his status, he had joined the knights as a page and gone through the grueling training to become a knight. It had been inevitable—his nature was one of a warrior. With a fiery temper, an insatiable competitive streak, a tall, strong physique, and unparalleled strength, he was always destined for combat.

Blair, by contrast, lacked any talent for physical endeavors, though his sharp mind was his greatest asset. The two brothers were polar opposites—Hermann, with less intelligence, still surpassed Blair in every physical way.

He was the main commander who led the allied forces with Jocelyn in the great barbarian extermination campaign… Odelliana mused. To think he was so helpless in the middle of the street, where everyone could see him. No wonder he must be furious.

Odelliana couldn’t help but imagine the frustration that must have burned in Hermann’s chest. It was a shame she couldn’t have witnessed the look on his face at that moment. But perhaps, in his rage, he would learn something important.

He needed to understand what it was like to be confined to a room, utterly dependent on others, unable to even leave the walls that now held him captive. Perhaps that would make him realize the heart of his poor, disabled sister.

“If only my two legs were still intact, and I wasn’t stuck here,” Odelliana muttered. “I would’ve gone straight to him and laughed in his face.”

In the end, Hermann’s frustration did nothing to ease her own boredom. The rain continued its relentless downpour, and reports of flood damage poured in from all corners. 

The atmosphere around her remained eerily quiet, but the knowledge of the devastation outside gnawed at her—a bitter reminder of nature’s merciless grip. Damn natural disasters, always claiming the lives of the innocent, leaving destruction in their wake. Yet, in the midst of it all, the inner city—the domain of the noble families—remained untouched, an island of peace amidst the chaos.

Just as the mounting sense of dread from the outside world began to weigh heavily on her, a piece of news arrived that would snap her from her stupor.

“Odette is back?”

“Yes. There’s been a commotion since this morning.”

The return of this unwelcome guest felt just as unsettling as the storm raging outside.

***

The servants of the mansion busied themselves in preparation for greeting the young lady, having learned that Odette had returned after completing her tour of the relief missions. Even the secluded annex, usually cut off from the rest of the world, buzzed with unusual activity.

Odelliana’s heart raced at the news of her return. She felt a powerful urge to rush out and meet her immediately. The very thought of the woman who had been the source of such painful memories made her feel disgusted to the point of nausea, yet the longing to meet her, to finally face her, was overpowering.

The dazzlingly beautiful mistress of her husband.

Despite the resentment and hatred that clung to her every thought, Odelliana couldn’t deny the strong curiosity that surged within her. Odette was a woman she had never met in her past life, a person with no connection to her before death. She knew a great deal about Jocelyn, but all she had heard about Odette were the public details—her affair with him, and nothing more.

“Will she come to see me?” she wondered aloud.

The thought of being confined here, unable to leave, gnawed at her. She was so close, yet so far. She couldn’t even go to meet her.

“I heard you were quite close as children… so…” Malena trailed off. 

Blair’s words echoed in her mind. He had always said that Odette was a kind-hearted girl. She would likely be pleased to return to the house. If that was true, perhaps Odette wouldn’t be like her parents, who never showed their faces.

“Are you that excited to see the young lady? I suppose you really like her?” Malena asked.

“Not at all,” Odelliana replied flatly.

“Then why do you act like you can’t wait to see her, constantly watching her every move?”

“Just because I want to see her doesn’t mean I like her.”

“You couldn’t even stand to look at your older brother.”

“That bastard doesn’t matter in my life. But Odette is different.”

Yes, she was very interested in Odette. There was so much she didn’t know, so much she wanted to learn. She wanted to understand what kind of person Odette truly was.

“You have to know your enemy to win a fight,” Odelliana muttered quietly.

Malena blinked in surprise. “You plan to fight with the young lady?” 

“Eventually.”

To be honest, she hoped they weren’t the kind of sisters who couldn’t live without each other. She hoped Odette was the type of person who deserved every ounce of hatred and resentment Odelliana had carried with her from her past life. She wished Odette wasn’t the perfect, kind-hearted sister. She didn’t need a sister who was also her husband’s mistress.

The internal battle she would soon face—torn between the woman she once was and the one she was now becoming—was one she wanted to avoid at all costs. Of all her family members, Blair was the only one she could trust.

Odette, the woman Odelliana had been waiting for, finally appeared before her exactly one week after her return. But she wasn’t alone.

“The young lady… went straight into an empty room with a male servant. She ordered that no one enter,” Malena reported.

“She barged in, didn’t even look for me, and just took over the room? And brought in a stranger?” Odelliana’s voice tightened with disbelief.

Her fleeting hope that Odette might be a kind sister evaporated instantly. No, Odette had been born a wicked woman—just as Odelliana had suspected all along.